Summer dreams

It was summer night
Just like the old days
When I was a hopeless romantic,
He promised me the moon.
Moonlight kissed us vehemently on cheeks
That turned red
I looked over the sky
Then to him
His face profused with sweat
His eyes on moon
Cold breeze swept past us
Making us shiver
I saw his toes embedded in mud
Sparkling eyes, stirring the sky
I stood there watching him
Hoping each time,
And days went with our dreams and hope.
Each summer when kisses of spring faded
We emanate with our dreams
Once belonged only to summer and moon.



When you have put your diary open
And wonder all the night what to write
As the window outside freeze with snow
Barely talking to the wind
Listening to the calm night
You expect the lights to go off
And lie in the warmth of the table lamp
Head on the soft pages
That had been crumbled with your dreams
When it was summer, all before.
You forgot the lines, written long before
In the blue beaded book
Which you tied with the red stained thread
That once belonged to your friend
For whom you were writing so long,
Waiting in the midst of the spring,
While winter torn all the pages away.


Poetic Poison

Chaos in my mind is all you need to know,
I never want it to be like the beginning,
Solitude of my dreams were always a mystery,
Like you always wanted, magics between winter,
How the flowers felt when it rained.
Smell of your hair grows through my nose
You spread your head in my arms,
At the moment when you realise,
You already lived between those pages,
Wait hopelessly for the shade,
I lie under the blanket
Even when my eyes are drowning,
In the rain soaked night,
Suddenly those memories walked out
Wet in rain, spreading mud in your palm,
You held my face in your arms
And poured poetic poison into my veins,
Which tasted sweetest ever,
Time had left the shadows,
I hear the poems from your mouth,
Exploring through the shores of words,
Miles away from chaos,
I find the right poet to listen to
Hide from the noises of the world,
I borrow a pen and write in my diary
About the life I longed to live.




I had a plant in my garden
That bloomed once in a year,
Which bought butterflies of sorrow.
Overwhelmed by their sadness,
I named them calm,
They fainted as the wind kissed them.
And there was a river, serene blue,
That flowed through the valley of green bed,
I searched for pearls in the depth of the river,
Ended up with pebbles,
Which never shone like the pearls,
I let go of them into the water.
Moon was fast asleep that night,
I sat on the rim of the river,
With cold breath on my naked palm,
I fluttered my fingers along the flow,
Still searching for the pearls,
Strolling towards the silence of night,
Warmth of a tree, its falling leaves,
And hymn fills the night,
With the smell of new blossoms.




I woke up with an unwritten poem,
Beating against my shaking fingers,
I stare at the naked sky
Wind is fluttering through
The half opened window
His arms around the pages of my book.
We made love to words,
I gave birth to your lines,
In the middle of night,
In the warmth of cold moon.
Silence of the night breaks,
We are stuck by time,
I failed to forget our memories,
You said you wanted to fall in love,
And you did
You spoke many secrets to me,
About your mistakes,
Your dreams, your scars.
I cut my vein, words fell out,
Scattered in the pages, wet,
Which you burnt, to purify,
To make things right,
I hope, I find those lost words,
One day, when it rains.




Dwell my mind, my thoughts
And find nothing, but the ashes
Scattered across my dreams,
You will fall into steep dark corridor
I doubt.
There was no judgement for this day,
Silence was my weapon
I was fighting my own words
When you took me to nothingness
I saw my shadow behind me,
Lingered through the naked sky,
Tired of counting footsteps,
You carried across the shores.
I wait, watching the river flow
Scream for someone to hear me
Looking at my staggered reflection in water.
I look back and find my shadow doesn’t exist,
You find those melodramatic words unworthy
And the life reckless.



She hugged him tightly when he arrived. “What do you think? Is it a he or a she?” She screamed. He was not smiling.
“Are you not happy?” Her heart was beating faster.
“You disappointed me very much” He whispered. “We have enough time ahead. We don’t need a child now”
She felt something pulling behind her as they moved towards doctor’s cabin.
He was talking to doctor. Her mind was floating through her womb. She could barely hear them.
He took her hands in his and said
“You have to do it now. It will only take a few seconds. And it is not painful. They will give you anesthesia” She nodded.
She was lying in the bed waiting for the scissors to cut off her womb. She closed her eyes.
“Will it hurt? She asked doctor.
“No, it won’t hurt you.”
“No, will it hurt my child?”
Doctor went dumb
Her mind was floating through only one question. “Is it a he or a she?”
“It’s over. You can go now” Doctor said
She felt weightless as she walked out.
“Are you okay? He asked
She nodded
She was too tired. She fell into the bed like a fish into water. Suddenly she woke up hearing a child’s cry. She felt like her womb was burning. She cried loudly. She was suffocating, drowning into darkness. He took her to lunatic asylum next day.
Room provided was a little dark. There were white curtains that fluttered now and then. She met many people. Most of them liked light than darkness. They cried when nights came. She wondered why. Sometimes she could hear loud noises from other rooms. The nurse said she was quiet than other mates. She gave her pills when she felt suffocated. Then she was at peace. She often heard her child’s cry and she was at more peace. After three months he came. She was asleep. Those days when she took pills, she could barely open her eyes. He slowly patted her hands. She woke up and hugged him tightly. There were no tears in her eyes. She felt extreme happiness.
He said “Everything is fine now. Doctor said you can leave today. Let’s go home”
“Not today, my daughter will come tomorrow, to take me.” She replied.
He stared at her a few seconds and then left the room. Nurse came and gave her three pills instead of one. She asked “You seem to be so happy to stay here. You didn’t go with him?”
“Tomorrow my daughter will come to take me”
She laughed on her reply and said
“How did you figure out it is a daughter?”
She knew. It is a daughter, just like her.
Next morning, her daughter came and took her home.


Letters I posted for him


We are miles apart,
Somewhere in the middle of stars, you are there,
I wait for you
To take me in your hands
I often chase stars to reach you
But I couldn’t
So I write my love.
I remember the day I learned to write,
When I was drawing blind lines
You filled my empty spaces with words
And seduced me with vowels
You imprinted my soul with poetry
And intoxicated me with love
You obsessed me with poetic phrases,
We made love to nights
Your refrains tasted sour,
So you drugged me with metaphors,
Old letters started withering into granules
Still I keep them because
Through your letters I learned to write.



Mess 2

He was a mess
My whole world of uncertainty.
I was blinded by his love,
Warmth of his body,
His naked soul
I nurtured in his arms,
He lured me in
When I struggled to stand in.
He was the flood I drowned in,
I bloomed through his veins.
Night was so calm
It refused our sleep,
I felt his breath on my neck
Refused to look into his eyes
I tasted his cigar coated lips,
He embraced me
I was curling into his wide arms
Like a leaf unfurling its skin,
I held him tight
And claimed his heart
He smuggled me,
Into the world of chaos,
I thought his tears could wash away my stains
But it was so ferocious,
It burned my body.